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Perfection, Purpose, Mess and Moments

I’ve been thinking about starting some kind of blog for a while now. The problem and delay, however has been that my intentions and purpose has kept shifting. I guess for a long time, I thought that my blog, in order to gain attention, had to have a single purpose or theme – that the perfection would be found in singularity. I suppose I read too many ‘how to blog’ blogs. The truth is, the abstract search for purpose and perfection was more of an excuse to procrastinate making a decision and committing to some kind of work. Sound familiar?

I study Law and International Studies and I’m incredibly passionate about politics. I’m endlessly frustrated by Australian domestic politics and the media and I keenly keep an eye on international developments. For years, I’ve used Facebook as my venting platform when it comes to politics – so much so that people actually identify me as opinionated. Whether this is a good or bad thing, I’m not sure. The ‘virtue’ of being opinionated tends to range from being an awesome, even admirable characteristic to downright irritating depending on who you ask. My closest friends, are my closest friends because they like this characteristic in me. Those further away from my inner circle tend to view it with ire. Sorry I’m not sorry.

Starting a blog on politics makes sense but I’ve also considered dedicating my blog to my impending year abroad. Yup yup! The whole reason I chose to study International Studies, way back in 2011, was pretty much entirely contingent on the exchange year abroad. In my mind it equated to an awesome gap year, where I could travel and do what I wanted. Now that, that reality is less than a month away, I can’t say I’m as enthusiastic as I was. The thought of being away from everything I know and am comfortable with is more terrifying than thrilling if I’m being perfectly honest. In any case, making a blog which exclusively shows the highlights of my exchange year is not a way I want to contribute to social media – that seems so instagram/pinterest/tumblr.

We are constantly flooded with images and notions of perfection – especially on instagram, pinterest and tumblr. How perfect lives look, how perfect friends look, how perfect bodies look, how perfect homes look. We are also reminded constantly that perfection is beyond our reach – that it doesn’t exist. Anthems proclaiming that ‘Nobody is Perfect’, articles and campaigns decrying photoshop, filters, photographers, fancy cameras and lighting experts, reminding us that we can’t be perfect like this. That our lives can’t or won’t look like this…  media logic – “Here is perfect… Haha you can’t have it.”

Except you can. Perfection does exist because perfection is subjective and because perfection is subjective, you can decide what is perfect. To me, perfection exists in moments but these moments are never a constant state of being, just as a sunset is never eternal, nor is a kiss. Moments which are as rare as they are fleeting. We constantly see ‘perfect moments’, yet seem to think these equate to perfect constants. Have you ever considered what it took to take that perfect sunset yoga picture? Or the awkward angle the blogger is standing at to take that perfect picture which simultaneously shows they’re somewhere interesting, wearing a fly as f*** outfit and holding a coffee? Have you tried to do that? Not cool. Much imperfection. Plenty inauthenticity.

The bottom line is that focusing on one aspect of my life, or sharing only the perfect highlights of me would serve to only show a tiny, fleeting and likely, inauthentic version of myself. I’m not only a student, and I’m not solely interested in politics. I doubt exchange will be all travel, sunsets and happy snaps and I don’t expect this of my future beyond exchange. I don’t want to contribute to the idea of singular perfection, and false expectation. Reality is messy but I’ve realised the perfection is in the mess and the moments. So this blog will be a blog about mess and moments. The mess of politics, moments of my life.

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